1. Make sure you use at least 5 cans of hairspray a day.
2. Makeup is mandatory.
3. Your guitar should be brightly colored.
4. One of your main goals is to see how many amps you can fit on stage.
5. Your other is to see how many half naked female dancers you can fit on stage.
6. You should always be wearing spandex pants.
7. If you look at all like a man, then you aren’t ready to leave the house.
8. Every song that you write should be about drugs or sex.
9. The main riff of your songs should be two power chord eighth notes followed by a rest. See “Cherry Pie” by Warrant.
10. Your solos should be melodic, and repetitive. See “Talk Dirty To Me” as made famous by Poison. « Read the rest of this entry »